I’m sure I’ve tried to be someone I’m not more times than I would care to admit. It’s been said that everyone is born an original but most die a copy. There’s probably a lot of truth in that. Some of it is for very good reasons: we should follow others as they follow Christ.
Men of great gifting and faithfulness are worthy to be emulated. But we can’t make them the standard for what God might do in our lives, which will be profound even if on a far lesser scale.
The truth is you are you. You need to come to grips with that fact. So do I. I’m not someone else. I don’t have their gifts, their passion, their platform, or their godly character. I’m kind of stuck being me just like you are stuck being you.
We have to allow God to work in us to will and do of his good pleasure and that will look really different for each of us. God only made one John Piper. He merely made one Matt Chandler. Just like he only made one you.
So, love God and be yourself. I can probably find a way to make that be something Saint Augustine once said, or perhaps once thought. Regardless, you should really stop trying to be someone you are not and start becoming who God made you to be.
God doesn’t make mistakes. He doesn’t make junk. You are not an accident. You are uniquely you.
Give your quirks, your idiosyncrasies, your limitations to him. He cares for you. After all, he made you. He didn’t make you to be John Piper or Matt Chandler or Beth Moore.
He made you to aspire to something even better: to be like Jesus and let him use unique-you to do what you were placed on this small blue dot for some indeterminate amount of time to do the things he prepared for unique-you to do long before he created the cosmos. Don’t settle for anything less.